An English Girl's First Impressions of Burmah

In Short

Written as an engaging travel memoir, this text details a young Englishwoman’s journey from London through the Suez Canal to Rangoon and into the hill station of Remyo in Upper Burma during the late nineteenth century. Uninterested in producing a solemn treatise, the author crafts an entertaining sequence of personal anecdotes, domestic mishaps, social observations, and jungle excursions. It endures as a vivid, lighthearted period document that balances wry self-deprecation with evocative descriptions of landscapes, colonial social dynamics, and the daily rhythms of Burmese life.

The Story

The narrative opens on the high seas, tracking a voyage from the Mediterranean through the Suez Canal and Red Sea to the port of Rangoon. The journey begins with a mix of awe and amusement, capturing desert mirages, dramatic tropical sunsets, and the lively drama of passing ships. Upon arriving in Rangoon, the author immerses herself in local sights, marveling at the majestic Shwedagon Pagoda and watching heavy teak logs expertly handled by timber elephants. Amidst these colorful scenes, however, the unfamiliar surroundings and tales of Eastern mysticism spark a sudden middle-of-the-night panic in her dimly lit hotel room.

From Rangoon, the author travels inland by train toward Mandalay, accompanied by a Madrassee ayah whose primary concern appears to be acquiring exotic foods wrapped in a red handkerchief at every stop. The journey continues toward the cooler retreat of the hill station of Remyo, starting with an unearthly 3:30 AM drive in a shaky horse-drawn carriage. The journey takes a dramatic turn when the carriage is abruptly swamped by armed men—an encounter that initial terror frames as a dacoit ambush.

Transitioning from carriage to horseback, the author endures a grueling two-mile gallop on an uncooperative pony while balancing a grotesquely oversized sola topee. Upon reaching her sister’s bungalow—a draughty structure of matting and wood that lets the wind sweep furniture directly into the backyard—she settles into station life. Household management brings its own humor, defined by endless negotiation with the unflappable cook and a absurdly divided hierarchy of servants where simple tasks require seven men to execute.

Life in Remyo revolves around the local club, nine-hole golf courses plagued by nullahs and dense jungle, and small-scale social functions where guests pray for "beef days" to break the monotony of Burmese chicken. Misadventures abound: rose cuttings turn out to be dead sticks, tea services are mistakenly paraded directly into a courtroom during an ongoing trial, and a guest’s casual remark ruins a carefully prepared peacock dinner. Outdoors, encounters with territorial water buffaloes, surprise table scorpions, and mischievous horses named "John" offer constant diversion.

The book culminates in a high-stakes jungle tiger hunt, where beaters flush out a massive predator. The author reflects on the brief pang of pity for the fallen beast before joining the triumphant procession back to the village. As the trip draws to a close, an arriving acquaintance casually discredits her most heroic tall tales, leaving her reputation shattered just as she prepares to depart. Ultimately, she bids farewell to the land of temple bells and golden pagodas, carrying home a deep appreciation for its beauty, warmth, and enduring charm.

How It Unfolds

The voyage begins Steaming through the Suez Canal and past Aden, the author takes in desert landscapes, mirages, and colorful sunsets while observing her fellow passengers. Upon landing in Rangoon, she marvels at timber-moving elephants and the grand Pagoda before succumbing to a sudden fit of nighttime terrors.

The trek to the hills Boarding a twenty-two-hour train to Mandalay alongside a food-obsessed ayah, the author eventually transitions to a carriage drive at dawn that turns into a alarming native encounter. She then battles an uncooperative pony and a wobbling sola topee on the long ride up to Remyo.

Station life and household chaos Settling into a draughty bungalow that blows missing items into the backyard, she learns to manage a sprawling household staff and negotiate daily menus with an unflappable Madrassee cook. Misunderstandings lead to a full afternoon tea service marching uninvited into her brother-in-law’s courtroom.

Socializing and jungle sports Life shifts between golf matches on jungle-bordered links, awkward dinner parties featuring unexpected peacock dishes, and dodging aggressive water buffaloes on bicycle rides. The expedition peaks with an intense tiger beat in the jungle, culminating in a triumphant return to the station.

The journey home After an ungenerous acquaintance debunks her exaggerated adventure stories, the author bids a nostalgic farewell to the country. She leaves behind the land of sunshine and temple bells to return to the bustling modern Western world.

The People

• The Author (Beth Ellis): A witty, self-deprecating English traveler who embarks on the trip to write a book about herself. She wants adventure and pleasant company, though her lack of equestrian skill, mild paranoia, and limited language skills frequently land her in absurd situations.
• The Author's Sister: A resident of Remyo who attempts to run a comfortable colonial household despite draughty matting walls, dead garden cuttings, and unpredictable staff.
• The Brother-in-Law: A local official who seeks order in both his home and court, though his authority is periodically disrupted by dacoit scares, bad horse trades, and unexpected tea processions.
• Po-Sin: The head butler, whose literal interpretations of the author's broken language result in grand, ceremonial deliveries of afternoon tea across the station.
• The Madrassee Cook: A remarkably unfazed servant who defends his fluctuating budget entries with irrefutable logic and insists on offering chicken for every meal.
• "John": An easy-going station pony with a mischievous sense of humor who delights in sabotaging the plans of pretentiously ambitious riders.

In Its Own Voice

"I am not naturally a coward, except when I am afraid; at other times I am as brave as a lion."

Setting a lighthearted, self-deprecating tone at the very start of her travel narrative.

"Life in such an atmosphere was no doubt healthy, but a trifle wearing to the nerves."

Describing the open-air design of her sister's Remyo bungalow, which allows constant wind to blow furniture straight through the house.

"Here Beauty and Peace hold eternal honeymoon."

Reflecting nostalgically on the idyllic charm and warmth of Burma as her journey comes to a close.

What It's Really About

Beneath its comedic layer of colonial domestic mishaps, the book explores the disorienting gap between Victorian expectations and the daily realities of life in Upper Burma. It gently satirizes the stiff social structures of the Anglo-Indian administrative class, contrasting their formal norms with the fluid, relaxed pace of the surrounding environment. The text examines how isolation in remote hill stations drives expatriates toward peculiar eccentricities, hyper-local rivalries, and elaborate social rituals. At its core, it contrasts the frantic ambition of the modern Western world with a leisurely, sun-drenched lifestyle where natural beauty and everyday humor outweigh formal rigidities.

Why Read It Today

This volume appeals to readers who enjoy sharp, observational travel writing reminiscent of Jerome K. Jerome or early E.M. Forster, delivered with a breezy, conversational cadence. Rather than presenting an exhaustive administrative study, it offers an intimate, highly readable slice of late-nineteenth-century life seen through an unpretentious lens. The author's crisp humor keeps the narrative moving briskly through dynamic scenes of train travel, uncooperative livestock, and station dinners.

Modern readers should note that the text reflects the unexamined colonial attitudes and imperial assumptions of 1899, including patronizing remarks about native servants and local populations. Additionally, readers sensitive to period hunting accounts will encounter casual descriptions of big-game sport. Yet for those seeking an authentic, lighthearted historical narrative, the author’s candid self-awareness, vivid descriptions of tropical landscapes, and sharp eye for human absurdity make it a charming, memorable period piece that stays with you long after the final page.