Con-Fen

In Short

This satirical short story follows two Martian officials who treat Earth as a cheap, food-rich tourist destination. Because most humans reflexively refuse to believe in extraterrestrial life, the Martians remain invisible, treating the city like a private playground. The narrative builds to a sharp, ironic climax when the duo blunders into a crowd of people who do believe in aliens. It endures as a clever, cynical meditation on the thin barrier between reality and perception, framed by a biting commentary on the disconnect between fans of speculative fiction and the actual, messy truth.

The Story

Koosh and Thuko, the Shisti and Assistant Shisti of Mars, arrive in Chicago with a stolen, borrowed Jovian spacecraft. They are looking for a year of indulgence, hoping to feast on the rich bounty of Earth, which they consider a paradise compared to their own barren, hungry world. They secure their ship on an empty rooftop, confident in their invisibility—a phenomenon they attribute to the willful non-belief of the human populace. As long as someone nearby denies their reality, the Martians are physically undetectable to everyone.

The pair heads to a grocery store, where their behavior is both bizarre and grotesque. They consume raw vegetables and canned goods, oblivious to the fact that their casual contact with shoppers is spreading an incurable disease—leprosy—among the human population. They move through the city with the entitlement of wealthy tourists, feeling no remorse for the damage they leave in their wake. They eventually decide to visit a swank hotel, hoping to replicate the gluttonous success of their colleague Yemma, who famously gained so much weight while hiding in a hotel kitchen that he could barely hop.

The mood shifts when they enter the hotel’s dining hall. Unbeknownst to them, they have entered the venue for the "Chicon II," the 10th World Science Fiction Convention. When they walk through the room, they aren't met with the usual apathy of the masses; they are greeted by a room full of people who are desperate to believe. The diners scream and react with immediate, terrifying recognition. Panicked by this unexpected attention, the Martians flee. They rush into the street, blinded by fear and desperate to reach their ship.

In their haste, they fail to account for the traffic. A truck driver, who does not believe in Martians, rolls through the intersection, oblivious to the creatures sprinting in front of his vehicle. The Martians are crushed instantly, their bodies reduced to splatters of blue fluid and scraps of flesh. The driver, whistling a tune, continues his route, never knowing what he has hit. Outside the hotel, the convention attendees are left to process the event. Two young fans begin to argue about the "logical" explanation for what they saw, debating the mechanics of invisibility belts versus dimensional travel. The story concludes with them walking past a banner for the convention, utterly failing to realize that the "monsters" they were speculating about were actually the real, physical beings they just witnessed being destroyed.

How It Unfolds

The voyage begins Koosh and Thuko land their stolen Jovian ship on a Chicago rooftop, viewing Earth as nothing more than a convenient, high-calorie vacation spot. They feel secure in their invisibility, as their safety relies entirely on the stubborn skepticism of the human race.

A feeding frenzy The Martians infiltrate a supermarket, gorging themselves on produce and canned goods while leaving a trail of destruction. They remain undetected by the clerk, who is too distracted by passing pedestrians to notice the two alien creatures raiding his shelves.

The fatal mistake Seeking greater luxuries, the pair enters a hotel, completely unaware that the establishment is currently hosting a major science fiction convention. Their presence triggers a panic among the patrons, who are primed by their own interests to believe exactly what they are seeing.

The final irony Driven by terror, the Martians flee back to the street, where they are killed by a truck driver who doesn't believe in them. The convention-goers remain outside, trapped in their own complex theories, never grasping the simple, tragic reality of the visitors they just lost.

The People

Koosh is the pilot of the mission and the more hesitant of the two. He is driven by a simple, gluttonous desire to fill his "starved body" and enjoys the sensory pleasures of Earth's food. His eye-stalks act as a barometer for his mood, twirling in pleasure or drooping in fear. He ultimately finds his end through his own inability to understand the psychological landscape of the humans he is visiting.

Thuko, the Assistant Shisti, is the more pragmatic and aggressive of the duo. He is the one who suggests the rooftop for the ship and quickly identifies the hotel as a source of luxury. He is entirely indifferent to the harm he causes, viewing humans merely as obstacles or food sources. His confidence in their safety is his undoing; he assumes that humanity is a monolith of skepticism, failing to realize that his destination—a science fiction convention—is a sanctuary for the very believers he needs to avoid.

Bicks and Paul represent the convention attendees. They are defined by their need to categorize and rationalize the world through the lens of their hobby. Even after witnessing a genuine, impossible event, they are unable to accept it as reality. Instead, they retreat into intellectual posturing, debating the technical specifications of "invisibility belts" or "dimensional shifts," effectively distancing themselves from the actual, gruesome truth of the event they just experienced.

In Its Own Voice

"All the savants know is that most of these Earthlings do not believe in our existence, and somehow that nonbelief acts to prevent them from acknowledging the evidence of their senses that we are among them."

Thuko explains the nature of their invisibility as they stand on a Chicago street.

"The Martians did not know of it, of course. But even if they had, it would have made no difference to them."

The narrator comments on the Martians' lack of concern regarding the leprosy they unintentionally spread among human shoppers.

"Baffled by the disappearance of the alien beings, they had straggled inside one by one. Few words were spoken among them, since each was mentally busy forming a theory to explain the occurrence."

The aftermath at the hotel describes how the witnesses prefer their own abstract theories over the reality of the martians' deaths.

What It's Really About

At its core, the book explores the dangerous gap between perception and objective reality. It satirizes the human tendency to prioritize intellectual frameworks—like science fiction tropes—over the immediate, sensory world. The Martians are only "invisible" because humans choose to be blind, and they only become "visible" when a specific subculture decides they want to see them. The story poses a cynical question: do we actually care about the truth, or are we just looking for a theory that fits our worldview? By showing the fans ignoring the reality of the Martians' corpses in favor of debating "invisibility belts," the author suggests that the most dedicated truth-seekers are often the most insulated from the reality standing right in front of them.

Why Read It Today

This story is a quintessential piece of 1950s science fiction, capturing the specific, mid-century wonder and skepticism toward the "Martian" trope. Readers who enjoy dark humor and ironic, twist-heavy narratives will find much to admire here. It is short, punchy, and moves with a frantic energy that mirrors the Martians' own desperate, gluttonous vacation.

However, the reader should be prepared for the prose of its time. The dialogue can feel stilted, and the casual, matter-of-fact way the narrative treats themes like the spread of leprosy—or the "scurrying" nature of the aliens—reflects the pulp sensibilities of the era. The Martians themselves are not sympathetic characters; they are greedy, careless, and essentially colonizers of a pantry. If you are looking for a story that humanizes aliens, this is the exact opposite. It is a cold, sharp look at how self-absorption defines both the visitor and the visited. The final image of the convention-goers arguing over the existence of the creatures that were just shredded by a truck is a lingering, haunting critique of fandom and academic detachment. It stays with you because it rings uncomfortably true, regardless of the decade in which it is read.