Hermione and Her Little Group of Serious Thinkers

In Short

This book is a satirical portrait of a wealthy, vapid socialite who flits through the trendy intellectual fads of her day. Through a series of short, episodic "monologues" and poems, we watch Hermione navigate a "Brainstorm Slum" of poets, mystics, and social reformers. She is the ultimate trend-chaser, adopting whatever philosophy or movement happens to be in vogue—from Nietzsche to prison reform—without ever understanding a word of it. It remains a sharp, enduring comedy about the timeless human desire to sound profound while remaining entirely superficial.

The Story

The narrative arc is circular, reflecting the repetitive, trend-obsessed life of its protagonist. We first meet Hermione as she convenes her "Little Group of Serious Thinkers," a gathering of pseudo-intellectuals, failed artists, and opportunistic gurus. She treats every new interest—whether it is Russian ballet, the "Cosmos," the "Superman," or the "liquor problem"—as a grand, life-changing discovery. She speaks in breathless, exclamation-pointed bursts, constantly seeking validation from her listeners.

As the chapters progress, we follow her from one "Cause" to the next. She attempts to apply high-minded social theories to the "Masses," though she never actually interacts with them, preferring to stay in her own comfortable social bubble. She constantly clashes with her bewildered, conservative parents, whom she dismisses as "Mid-Victorian" and hopelessly out of touch with the "New Thought." Her circle of friends includes characters like Fothergil Finch, a self-proclaimed "Poet of Revolt" who writes about thunderbolts but is terrified of his own shadow, and various Swamis who prey on her gullibility and her family's wealth.

Throughout, Hermione seeks to find "Soul Mates" and achieve "psychic harmony," all while worrying about whether she is being a "Symbol" in her daily life. She tries to understand the "Involuntary" and the "Infinite," yet her thoughts consistently drift back to her own wardrobe, her social standing, and her desperate need to be perceived as deep. By the end, we see that she hasn't changed at all. She is an empty vessel for the zeitgeist. The final passages confirm that her type is deathless; even as one trend dies, she will simply move on to the next, eternally repeating her hollow platitudes. The book concludes with the realization that for every "Little Group" that fades, another will inevitably take its place, ensuring the cycle of nonsense continues indefinitely.

How It Unfolds

The salon opens Hermione introduces her circle of "freaks, nuts, and bugs," establishing the tone of vanity and intellectual posturing that defines her social life.

The cycle of superficiality She jumps between unrelated topics—like Russian art, Bergson’s philosophy, and Dew-hopping—treating each with the same superficial intensity while claiming to be "serious."

The clash with reality Her attempts to engage with the "Masses" or "Prison Reform" reveal her complete ignorance of the world outside her class, as she views these struggles merely as aesthetic or social accessories.

The romantic posturing She and her entourage, including the poet Fothergil Finch, perform a "Pagan Masque," dressing up as gods and goddesses to play at deep spiritual significance.

The persistent cycle The book ends with the understanding that Hermione is not an anomaly; she is a symptom of a culture that values the appearance of depth over substance, destined to move from one "cause" to the next forever.

The People

Hermione is the central figure, defined by her desperate need to be seen as an advanced, "serious" thinker. She wants to be profound, but her only tools are a shallow vocabulary and a constant need for social approval. She is trapped by her own inability to look beneath the surface of anything.

Fothergil Finch is her primary acolyte, a "Poet of Revolt" who imagines himself a dangerous, virile martyr to society. In reality, he is a coward who clings to Hermione for relevance, acting as a "genius hound" who brings her new trends to keep her interested.

Hermione’s Parents serve as the grounded, if weary, counterpoint to her hysteria. Her father is a frustrated, practical man who just wants his daughter to stop bringing "damned little vers libre" poets into his home, while her mother is presented as a traditional woman who is bewildered by her daughter's constant "causes."

The various Swamis and Gurus are the opportunists who inhabit the "Brainstorm Slum." They provide the "spiritual" guidance that Hermione craves, taking advantage of her gullibility by selling her exotic, half-baked philosophies that she can repeat at her next gathering.

In Its Own Voice

"Accent! Accent! What would art be without accent? Accent is coming in -- if you get what I mean -- and what they call 'punch' is going out."

Hermione explains her shallow devotion to artistic trends during a discussion about Russian culture.

"I ask myself every night before I go to bed: 'Have I been BROAD today? Or have I failed?'"

She highlights her obsession with performative self-improvement during a lecture on prison reform.

"Slay her by thousands, friend -- but list: More Little Groups will rise tomorrow!"

The narrator concludes that figures like Hermione are an inescapable part of the cultural landscape.

What It's Really About

At its core, the book is a satire of the "intellectual" poseur. It asks why we are so drawn to the trappings of profundity—the jargon, the "isms," the fashionable causes—even when we have no actual understanding of them. Hermione represents the human tendency to use "deep" language to cover up a profound lack of inner substance. The book argues that there will always be a class of people who prioritize the aesthetic of being smart over the work of actually thinking. It explores the tension between the desire to be "advanced" or "modern" and the reality that most people are merely mimicking the intellectual fads of their neighbors.

Why Read It Today

You should read this if you enjoy biting, observant satire that pokes fun at the kind of people who treat every social media trend as a moral imperative. It feels remarkably modern; though the specific references—like the "Swami" fads or "Dew-hopping"—are period-specific, the personality type is timeless. Hermione is the spiritual ancestor of anyone who adopts a cause solely because it sounds sophisticated at a dinner party.

The book can be a bit repetitive, as it is composed of bite-sized, episodic rants that can start to feel similar after a while. The prose is deliberately cloying and breathless to match Hermione’s speech patterns, which is a brilliant stylistic choice but can be exhausting to read for long stretches. Additionally, the dialect and some of the period-specific social attitudes reflect the early 20th century; the casual elitism and the caricatures of the "Masses" are clearly meant to be part of the joke on Hermione’s own ignorance, but they are still products of their time. If you want a quick, funny, and cynical look at the shallowness of socialites and "thinkers," this is a sharp, witty classic that will stay with you every time you encounter someone trying a little too hard to sound deep.