Local option in Loco-Land

In Short

Set in the rugged, fictional domain of Yaller Rock County, Montana, this comic Western follows gold prospectors Ike Harper and "Dirty Shirt" Jones as they drift back to the town of Piperock just in time for a local option election on temperance. Finding the community wildly divided between the dry crusaders and saloon loyalists, the pair get dragged into political rallies, staged temperance plays, tavern brawls, and goat stampedes. Through misdirected shotguns and accidental intoxications, Tuttle captures the chaotic, absurd nature of frontier politics and small-town rivalry with enduring lighthearted humor.

The Story

Returning from an unsuccessful mountain gold hunt with empty pockets and untamed beards, Ike Harper and Dirty Shirt Jones hit the trail back to Piperock. Along the way, they find campaign posters nailed to trees urging voters to elect Lindhardt Cadwallader "Scenery" Sims for sheriff and "defeat the demon rum." Confused by the sudden wave of moral reform, they meet travelling preacher "Old Testament" Tilton and goat-herder "Mighty" Jones, who are already at odds over whether Yaller Rock County ought to vote itself dry.

Upon entering Piperock, Ike and Dirty discover that local saloon keeper Buck Masterson is sitting behind his bar armed with a shotgun, ready to blow away Scenery Sims for slapping an injunction on him. Meanwhile, incumbent sheriff Magpie Simpkins has resorted to sneaking drinks from a hidden floorboard demijohn to protect his political reputation. The temperance movement, spearheaded by Mrs. Smith, Sally Mudgett, the Widow Sanders, and a visiting minister named Rev. Algernon Pettingill Parsley, recruits Ike to help organize a local production of the anti-alcohol play Ten Nights in a Barroom.

Complications escalate rapidly when Rev. Parsley visits Buck's saloon complaining of stomach cramps. Ike misdiagnoses the minister's pain and serves him spiked ginger ale; Parsley quickly warms to the concoction, gets thoroughly intoxicated, and leads a loud, disorderly campaign mass-meeting down to the rival town of Paradise alongside an unorthodox brass-and-jew's-harp band. The entire group ends up spending the night in the Paradise jail.

Undeterred by their night in durance vile, the dry faction pushes forward with their performance of Ten Nights in a Barroom back at Mint Hall, casting Ike as the bartender and Polecat Perkins—a local skunk farmer—as a drunkard. The performance collapses into total bedlam when real violence, clumsy stagecraft, and angry audience members collide. To make matters worse, Scenery Sims unleashes a herd of aggressive, belligerent goats into Buck's saloon to drive out the drinkers. Ike, Dirty, and the rest of the town get battered, trampled, and thrown into physical chaos.

Escaping the madhouse of Piperock, Ike and Dirty ride north to the nearby town of Powder River. Dropping into a local saloon owned by Fog-Horn Foster, they are shocked to find Rev. Parsley behind the bar, having abandoned the temperance cause entirely to work as a bartender. Fog-Horn explains to the baffled prospectors that the wild vote they just witnessed was only a direct primary election, and that the main local option decision will not even happen until November. Realizing the political madness is far from over, Ike and Dirty Shirt prompt their burros onward, determined to put as much distance between themselves and Piperock as possible before the real election arrives.

How It Unfolds

The trail home Ike Harper and Dirty Shirt Jones return from a fruitless prospecting trip and find political notices tacked to trees along the trail to Piperock. They encounter local eccentric Old Testament Tilton and a furious goat-herder named Mighty Jones, learning that a temperance crusade is threatening to vote the county dry.

Tension in Piperock Arriving in town, Ike and Dirty find saloon owner Buck Masterson waiting behind the bar with a shotgun for candidate Scenery Sims, while Sheriff Magpie Simpkins drinks in secret to save his political skin. The local temperance ladies corner Ike and press him into service for an upcoming moral play.

The remedy backfires Rev. Algernon Pettingill Parsley visits the saloon seeking relief for stomach cramps, where Ike inadvertently gets him drunk on spiked ginger ale. The intoxicated minister leads a traveling musical campaign rally to the town of Paradise, landing the whole political entourage in jail overnight.

Disaster at Mint Hall The temperance play Ten Nights in a Barroom degenerates into farce as props break, actors fight, and skunk-farmer Polecat Perkins creates an uproar. Ike escapes the hall by jumping out a window, while the town's dry and wet factions clash openly.

The goat stampede Scenery Sims unleashes a herd of unruly goats into Buck's saloon to evict the tavern patrons, resulting in a chaotic brawl that leaves Ike and Dirty Shirt bruised and trampled.

The truth at Powder River Fleeing Piperock, Ike and Dirty ride to Powder River, where they discover Rev. Parsley working behind a bar and learn that the chaos was merely a direct primary, prompting the pair to keep riding north.

The People

• Ike Harper: The narrator and easygoing prospector who continuously gets dragged into civic schemes he wants no part of. Ike wants nothing more than peace, quiet, and a drink, but his practical attempts to resolve conflicts usually result in total bedlam.
• "Dirty Shirt" Jones: Ike’s long-time prospecting partner, who is deeply skeptical of reform movements and fierce in defense of his right to drink. Dirty Shirt’s frank observations about small-town hypocrisy provide a constant commentary on Piperock's absurdities.
• Lindhardt Cadwallader "Scenery" Sims: A tiny, raspy-voiced former shepherd running for sheriff on a anti-rum platform. Scenery lacks physical intimidation, so he tries to enforce his political ideals through legal injunctions, absurd rhetoric, and borrowed livestock.
• Magpie Simpkins: The lanky, melancholic incumbent sheriff who finds himself caught between maintaining public support and enjoying his own private stash of alcohol.
• Rev. Algernon Pettingill Parsley: An earnest visiting minister brought in to champion local option, whose total lack of familiarity with hard frontier drinks leads to his speedy, accidental downfall into tavern life.
• Buck Masterson: The hot-tempered owner of the local saloon who relies on a loaded shotgun to settle political and personal disputes with anti-liquor campaigners.

In Its Own Voice

“Talking about?” he whispers hoarse-like. “Go to ——!” And then he slaps the pinto with his whip, and they went away on the lope.

Mighty Jones reacts with furious disbelief when Ike and Dirty fail to realize the county is on the verge of a temperance vote.

“Brother,” says he, “that ginger ale was a boon and a blessing to me. I was suffering, and ye took me in. Let’s have one on me.”

Rev. Parsley unknowingly praises the spiked mixture Ike served him to cure his stomach cramps.

“I’ve been an actor,” says he, leaning on the bar and grinning at us, “and Fog-Horn hankered for prohibition in Yaller Rock. You see, gents, if it’s dry over there, it makes big business over here. Sabe?”

Rev. Parsley reveals the economic scheme behind neighboring tavern owners supporting the local option campaign.

What It's Really About

Beneath its slapstick surface, the book presents a satire of small-town political fervor, moral hypocrisy, and the unintended consequences of reform movements. Tuttle paints frontier democracy not as an orderly civic exercise, but as a circus driven by personal grudges, financial self-interest, and complete misunderstandings of basic legal procedures like direct primaries. The story highlights how easily idealistic crusades can be co-opted by opportunistic figures—such as neighboring saloon keepers hoping to gain a monopoly—while showing that average citizens are often simply trying to navigate the madness without getting caught in the crossfire or trampled by livestock.

Why Read It Today

Readers who appreciate classic Western humor, historical satire, and vernacular narrative will enjoy this brief, energetic tale. Tuttle writes with an authentic, dry frontier voice that relies heavily on period slang, colorful colloquialisms, and sharp comedic timing.

The story moves at a relentless pace, delivering a continuous stream of absurd situations—from disastrous theatrical plays to runaway goat stampedes. Potential readers should be prepared for heavy dialect, phonetic spellings, and dated cultural tropes typical of early 20th-century popular magazine fiction. However, for those interested in lighthearted historical comedy, the book provides an entertaining glance into the broad, rowdy humor of the American West.