The unknown [Night watches, Part 7.]

In Short

This narrative centers on an unnamed night-watchman working at a London wharf who finds himself beleaguered by the presence of a ship captain’s wife. To curb her possessive nature, the watchman orchestrates an elaborate ruse involving a fake love letter from a mysterious woman named "Dorothy." The scheme unravels when the watchman’s own wife intercepts a second letter, leading to an unlikely alliance between two suspicious spouses. The story survives as a masterclass in comic irony, showcasing how petty deceptions inevitably collapse under the weight of human vanity and domestic tension.

The Story

The night-watchman, a man well-acquainted with the trials of marriage, observes the plight of Captain Bill Smithers. Smithers is a gentle, good-looking man, but his life has become a misery due to his wife, who insists on accompanying him on every voyage to ensure he remains under her thumb. Desperate to help the captain gain some freedom, the watchman crafts a fake love letter from a girl named "Dorothy," directing Smithers to a secret meeting at Cleopatra's Needle. He intends for the wife to find the letter, hoping the resulting chaos will convince her that the captain is being pursued and that she should relax her grip.

The plan seems to work initially. Mrs. Smithers discovers the letter, gasps in horror, but then unexpectedly becomes remarkably good-tempered, allowing her husband to stay behind while she ostensibly visits a cousin. The watchman, amused, later learns from the captain that the "meeting" was a disaster because the captain went himself, hoping to meet the mysterious girl, only to find his wife already there waiting for the rival. The captain remains hopelessly smitten with the idea of being pursued, even while his home life remains tense.

Determined to push the joke further, the watchman writes a second letter, this time intending to mail it to the captain. However, he leaves it in his own pocket, where his own wife finds it. She, believing the watchman is the one cheating with "Dorothy," erupts in fury. When the watchman arrives at the wharf, he finds Captain Smithers in a state of righteous indignation, defending the honor of the mysterious "Dorothy" against his own accusations.

The climax arrives when the watchman’s wife storms the wharf and confronts Mrs. Smithers. The two women, united by their shared suspicion of the phantom Dorothy, compare notes and realize they are both victims of the same mysterious correspondence. Rather than realizing they are being played by the watchman, they seize the opportunity to hunt down the girl. The watchman is forced to pay for a cab to transport his wife and the captain’s wife on a wild-goose chase to confront their imagined rival. The story ends with the watchman and the captain left on the wharf, both thoroughly defeated by their respective spouses, while the two women head off together in a cab, united in their search for a woman who does not exist.

How It Unfolds

The meddlesome observer The night-watchman introduces the captain as a quiet, handsome man who has unfortunately fallen under the control of a jealous, suspicious wife. He decides to intervene, believing the woman needs a lesson in the dangers of excessive suspicion.

The first deception The watchman writes a letter signed by "Dorothy" and arranges for it to be delivered to Mrs. Smithers. The trick succeeds in sowing doubt, but the captain’s own curiosity leads him to the meeting spot, where he is caught by his wife.

A domestic error The watchman attempts to repeat the prank, but he accidentally leaves the second letter in his own pocket. His wife discovers the note, leading to a domestic confrontation that shifts the weight of the scheme onto the watchman’s shoulders.

The wives unite The watchman’s wife arrives at the wharf to confront her husband, only to discover Mrs. Smithers has received a similar letter. The two women compare the notes and forge a temporary, hostile alliance to find the interloper.

A final defeat The watchman is forced to provide money for a cab, which the two wives take to track down the non-existent Dorothy. The story concludes with the two men left behind, realizing that their attempts to manipulate their domestic lives have only resulted in further subjugation.

The People

The night-watchman acts as the story's narrator and self-appointed puppet master. He views himself as a shrewd observer of human folly, yet his desire for "amusement" blinds him to his own vulnerability. By the end, he is stripped of his money and his peace of mind, reduced to a passive servant of his wife’s sudden authority.

Captain Bill Smithers is the "handsomest" man the watchman knows, yet he is utterly naive. Despite his wife's suffocating behavior, he remains stubbornly romantic, clinging to the idea that a beautiful girl has taken a fancy to him. He is ultimately unchanged, remaining a man who prefers the mystery of a fake letter over the reality of his own marriage.

Mrs. Smithers is the engine of the captain’s misery. Driven by jealousy, she treats her husband like a prisoner. When she encounters the watchman’s wife, she reveals a capacity for cold, coordinated action, showing that she is more interested in the hunt for a rival than in reconciliation.

The watchman’s wife appears late in the story as a force of nature. She is pragmatic, sharp-tongued, and entirely unwilling to tolerate her husband’s supposed infidelity. She is the final architect of the watchman’s downfall, successfully asserting her control over his resources and his schedule.

In Its Own Voice

The watchman reflects on the inherent burden of being an attractive man in a world of jealous spouses:

"One drawback to a good-looking man is that he generally marries young; not because 'e wants to, but because somebody else wants 'im to."

After the watchman's wife finds the incriminating note in his pocket, she makes her position perfectly clear:

"I might be sorry for not saying some things, but I don't think I shall."

When the two wives realize they are both being cheated on by the same mysterious woman, their shared fury creates a strange, new bond:

"The two of 'em stood there looking at each other for a minute, and then my wife, holding the letter between 'er finger and thumb as if it was pison, passed it to Mrs. Smithers."

What It's Really About

The story explores the fragile power dynamics within marriage, particularly the way suspicion can act as a self-fulfilling prophecy. The watchman’s experiment with "Dorothy" is a metaphor for the way secrets—whether real or manufactured—distort the reality of a relationship. The narrative argues that truth is less important to the characters than the narratives they construct about one another. By creating a phantom, the watchman unintentionally reveals that the wives are not interested in the truth, but in the power to punish. Ultimately, the book suggests that attempts to "manage" a spouse through deception are doomed to fail, as the act of lying creates a vulnerability that the other party will inevitably exploit to maintain control.

Why Read It Today

Readers who enjoy the brisk, sardonic humor of early 20th-century English storytelling will find much to admire here. The narrative voice is distinctive—thick with cockney-inflected dialect—which creates an immediate, immersive atmosphere of the London docks. It feels like hearing a tall tale shared over a pint, full of cynical wisdom and dry observations.

The story does require patience with its period attitudes, specifically regarding the domestic power struggle and the blunt, often adversarial way the characters view marriage. These are not modern, egalitarian partnerships; they are battlegrounds where the watchman and the captain are constantly trying to outmaneuver their wives, and vice-versa. Some readers may find the watchman’s casual sexism and the manipulative nature of the plot grating, though the story is self-aware enough to punish him for his arrogance. The primary appeal lies in the rhythm of the language and the escalating absurdity of the plot. What stays with you is the final image of the two wives sitting side-by-side in a cab, united in their pursuit of a lie, and the two men left behind, humbled and powerless. It is a sharp, compact piece of writing that effectively demonstrates the futility of trying to control the people we live with.